Monday, March 17, 2008

Saying Goodbye

My Grandpa had a stroke Monday February 25. He was found at 3 pm on the floor with obvious impairments including speech loss and left side immobility. He was admitted to Georgetown Hospital where, after a battery of tests, it was confirmed that he had indeed had a sizable stroke on the right side. The doctors were hopeful because he was gaining small bits of usage on his left side (he could squeeze his hand and raise his left foot). The doctors were thinking that he would be moving to a rehab facility that Friday February 29 (stroke patients are typically moved to rehab on day 5). Unfortunately he failed all swallow tests that they gave him which meant that he had to remain tube fed. When they tried to sit him up for Physical Therapy in the hospital his heart rate spiked up to 160-170. The doctors were very concerned and wouldn't move him until they knew that he would be more stable. The big, big concern was that with stroke victims the sooner the rehab can begin the better their chances are for recovery. Thursday morning, March 6, my aunt reported that Grandpa was unable to squeeze her hand and when she asked him if he knew who she was his eyes rolled back in his head as if he were going unconscious. My aunt also reminded everyone that he had an advanced directive to not keep him alive on life support. So the prayerful decision that needed to be made was when is it time to take Grandpa home? Have we tried enough options to help him recover? How hard would Grandpa want us to try before saying we are done? I went on Friday March 7 to see my grandpa (along with my mom and my sisters and stepfather). We spent 3 days visiting and making wonderful memories with Grandpa.
Tuesday morning, March 11, Grandpa was moved to Hospice Care. After a long weekend of discussions that was the decision that everyone felt would honor Grandpa's wishes. Beginning Sunday evening they moved a bed into his room (at the hospital) so that someone could be at his side all the time. Tuesday night my uncle sat by Grandpa's side during his first night in the Hospice. At some point in the wee hours of the night the nurses let my uncle know that they thought the end was very close. And at about 5 am on March 12 Grandpa passed away. We all had a wonderful time with him those last few days. He made lots of jokes - even in his very limited state. He called names and made jokes and was at times the same old 'Granpaw' we knew and loved. We sang songs and shared stories and had bittersweet goodbyes. My mom and her brother and sister decided to have a small memorial for him at his home in Georgetown on Sunday morning, March 16.

I wanted to say thank you to everyone who sent their love, prayers and condolences. As sad as our loss is, the time with family this past weekend was refreshing and was a great reminder of the power and strength of a loving family. While my grandfather will be missed by so many his legacy will live on for generations. I learned a lot about my Grandpa these past few weeks that is (in my opinion) pretty amazing. My mom and her sister and brother wrote his obituary and I was in awe of some of things that he accomplished in his 80 years on this planet.

Thanks again and hopefully the Gaters will be back to "normal" pretty soon. We are looking forward to celebrating Easter with our church and family this weekend. As I think of my Grandpa's last days and the suffering that he likely endured I am reminded of the Great Suffering that Jesus took upon Himself for our sake and am humbled. May you be reminded of the new life we are afforded in Christ as you prepare for this weekend.

(If you are interested I am going to try to post his obituary as a comment to this post.)

1 comment:

Unknown said...

Obituary
Ambassador Harold Eugene Horan

Ambassador Harold Eugene Horan, a native of Houston, Texas, died Wednesday, March 12, 2008 at 5:11 AM, in Washington DC. He was 80 years old and died of natural causes following a stroke. Ambassador Horan had lived in Washington, DC off and on since 1954 and considered it his home.

Ambassador Horan served in the Army during World War II. He attended Rice University and the University of Houston Law School. In 1954, he and his wife Bonnie, nee McLeroy, moved to Washington DC where he worked as an attorney for the Federal Trade Commission.

From 1960 to 1980 Ambassador Horan worked for the Foreign Service. His tours included Iran, Italy, Mali, Liberia and finally Malawi, where he was appointed Ambassador by President Carter.

In 1972 Amb. Horan went on sabbatical to the National War College, then served as Senior Advisor on African and International Organization Affairs at the National Security Council from 1973 to 1976 and Deputy Assistant Secretary of State for African Affairs from 1980 to 1981.

Amb. Horan retired from the Foreign Service in 1981 and spent six years at Georgetown University as a professor and Deputy Director of the Institute for the Study of Diplomacy, as well as working as a consultant on African affairs to the State Department. During his free time he volunteered at Iona working with early Alzheimer’s patients.

He is survived by his ex-wife, three children, Elizabeth Verderosa and Tessa Bell, both residing in NJ, and Jim Horan, who lives in Rockville, MD; seven grandchildren, three great grandchildren, and his companion, Mary Brady.

His life was devoted to his family and his country and to both he gave full measure.